Grace Found Me

Happy 2024, dear reader; today I'm reflecting on what's ahead.

1

In The Blink Of An Eye

Tonight as we're addressing the envelopes for Joshua's graduation announcements, I can't help but wonder:

How did we go from this ... 

to this, so quickly?

In the blink of an eye.

Like overnight.

Or so it seems.

Actually, it was lots of blinks

and a few sleepless nights,

many fervent prayers

and a whole lot of forgiveness and grace.

And as we head into another last,

our last FISD Teacher Appreciation Week, 

here's what's on my heart and mind.

To all of Joshua's teachers, thank you.

Thank you for celebrating Joshua for who he is

while gently nudging him to reach higher and be better.

Thank you for finding ways to

productively channel his enthusiasm and energy,

his inquisitive and stubborn curiosity,

and his passionate pursuit of creative problem-solving.

Thank you for being firm yet fair.

Thank you for trying to help him understand

that mistakes are just opportunities for growth

even as his perfectionism threatens to paralyze him.

Thank you for ignoring some of the small stuff

while holding him accountable for the stuff that matters.

Thank you for not letting him get by with less than his best.

Thank you for laughing with him in the good times,

and for holding his heart when he was hurting.

Thank you for preparing him for the future

with those all-important soft success skills.

Thank you for always going that extra mile for him

and for loving him unconditionally.

And above all, thank you for embracing Joshua 

and for helping him find joy in the journey.

We appreciate you, more than you'll ever know.

1

A Stronger Song

I almost didn't go to church this morning, because it's a holiday weekend here, and I was feeling kind of lazy. But we're starting a Karen Kingsbury book study and I'd invited my friend Carol to join me for our Sunday School class so I went, because I said I would. And I'm so glad I did, because our teacher shared this video clip, which really has me thinking, reflecting, and wondering.

It's so interesting, the two versions of Amazing Grace that this talented music director sang. The first one was pretty textbook, safe and clean. But when the host gives him a new perspective from which to sing it and couples it with his permission to bring it, his voice amplifies and he sings with incredible passion.

So today's question is this: What makes your song better?

Is it trust? A willingness to be vulnerable? Knowing your why?

Is it a safe place? Community? Unconditional positive regard?

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my recovery from being hit 

by that drunk driver because that life-changing event ended up 

strengthening my song.

It taught me to slow down and savor, 

it taught me to be grateful in all things, 

and it taught me to forgive. 

Even though it was a dark season of panic and pain,

the whole ordeal held an opportunity,

the burden hid a blessing.

I just had to be willing to look for it

and be ready to recognize the gift when it found me.

It took a lot of patience, persistence and perseverance;

sometimes more than I thought I could muster. 

But it was totally worth the work.

Liz Murray had this to say about staying the course:

It takes courage to change our song,

to trust enough to leave the script,

to share our music with passion,

to sing it out for the whole world to hear. 

How will you sing a stronger song today? Tomorrow?
This week? This month? This year?

0

My Name Is Blessing

Today is bittersweet, because it's our last official day of Spring Break 2016. What a glorious week of restoration and rejuvenation it has been. The sun shining through my window is calling me outside for some more Vitamin D, so today's post will be short and sweet. It's a bittersweet story about kindness and hope, one which was shared with me by my friend Jen Hammerle. 

Click the book cover to go to the author's website

Based on the true account of a Kenyan child with a physical disability, this tale finds a young Muthini living with a kind grandmother Mumo, who is struggling to make ends meet for him and his eight cousins. Check out this beautiful book's trailer:

Mumo, whose name means Grace, is forced with a difficult decision to journey to a Orphanage where Muthini might have a chance at a better life, but will they even allow a child whose name means Suffering to stay?

On my first reading, I wasn't sure I liked that the Orphanage was going to change the little boy's name, and I'm not sure my students will either. Use this as a springboard for a discussion about the importance of a name. What might, could, would be the difference in life for a child whose name means Suffering vs. one whose name means Blessing? Should the Orphanage take Muthini as he is or is there a benefit in changing his name? What does this have to do with mindset?

Create an empathy experience: After reading the book aloud, ask for a volunteer and tape that student's fingers down to recreate what it was like for Muthini Baraka to only have the use of two fingers on his one hand and none on his other. What skills might they still do handily? What things will be difficult to do without assistance? What is the experience of missing fingers like? How does it feel? What do you want or need to adapt and thrive?

Blessings are everywhere. As a follow-up activity, encourage students to make a list of their blessings. Can they get to 50? 100? 500?

For more engaging activity suggestions from the publisher, click {here}. For more information about the author's work at Creation of Hope, click {here}. 

1

My Friend Grace

Today I'm frustrated because I had an epic Mommy fail.

A Friday fail.

A FlaVorIce fiasco.

By now you're probably thinking Oh, no, what happened?

Well, here's the backstory.

It was last night, as Joshua was headed back to Marching Band practice, when he mentioned that he needed to put twenty of these FlaVorIce in the freezer because he wanted to surprise his French Horn section with a treat at break on Friday morning. I told him to go on the practice, that I'd do it for him. And we both went on our way, never giving it a second thought.

This morning at o'dark hundred, as Joshua was getting ready for Marching Band, he asked if I could help him get those frozen treats into an insulated carrier ... 

and that's when I froze. 

I went numb, actually, and my heart sank. He must have noticed, because he added, "you did put them in the freezer last night, right?" 

I was frozen, but they weren't.

I'd failed. Big time.

And it was a time when failure didn't feel like an option.

Nor did it feel like a first attempt in learning as seen on these cute little minis that keep popping up on Pinterest.

Click for source and to download.

So my brain kicks into problem-solving mode.

When did he need them by?

Would they freeze in time?

If not, where could I buy some frozen ones?

Surely I could sneak them up to the school.

But he shrugged it off, hugged me, and told me not to worry about it, that he could do it next Friday. When I checked the calendar, there wasn't a practice scheduled for that day. so I suggested Monday. Surely they'd be sufficiently frozen by Monday! But he said no, that wouldn't work. Why not? I pushed.

Joshua: Because it's not alliteration.

Me: Wait, what?

Joshua: Alliteration.

Me: You've lost me.

Joshua: Like Watermelon Wednesday. This was going to be Friday Freezer Pops. It's okay, mom. It's fine.

And I started to cry. 

I'd let my boy down, in a big way, and he was comforting me with a gentle reminder about my friend Grace. I was beating myself up for forgetting and he was forgiving me, no questions asked. I was trying to make it better, and he was telling me that it's okay.

Forgiveness on a Friday; how's that for alliteration? 

When John got back from dropping him off, I asked if Joshua was as upset about the freezer pops as I was, and he said no. There's a part of me that will always feel frustration that I foiled Joshua's plan to treat his section to a FlaVorIce at break. But the bigger part of me is grateful for and blessed by his forgiveness and grace.

When's the last time you got a visit from your friend Grace?

4

Grieving The Goodbye With Grace

As midnight approaches and I get ready to say goodbye to May,

as we get ready to say goodbye to another school year this week,

and as I prepare to say goodbye to an office I moved in to back when we used dial-up to connect to the Internet, my thoughts turn to one of my favorite 

childhood characters, Winnie The Pooh.

It's been a month.

And what a month it has been.

A month since they told me I was being transferred.

A month of heartbreak and heartache.

A month of grieving the goodbye. 

Hard stuff.

So hard that some days it hurt to breathe.

Some days I felt sick to my stomach.

Some days I couldn't stop crying.

And I couldn't exactly figure out why.

That's important, you know, getting to the why.

Because once we know the why, we can get to the how.

It was this Thursday, on my mental-health day away from school,

 that something my sister said helped me get to the why. 

It's kind of like a divorce, she said. 

One that you didn't see coming. One that you don't want. And one that you're having trouble accepting. Of course you're grieving.

Amen. Someone gets it. And the pieces fell into place.

I was hurled into a separation I didn't ask for and don't want.

No wonder it hurts so bad. Yes, it makes sense to me now.

I understand why I haven't been myself.

It's not that I don't want to follow my kids next door,

or nurture the seeds I've planted, or experience them in the next age and stage. 

It's that I was blindsided by an unwanted break. 

One that shocked me.

And one that hurt. 

To the core.

I wish I could say that I've handled it with grace.

Some days were better than others, but this month,

this month has been really challenging.

Difficult at best.

A real character builder.

An emotional roller coaster. 

I've been sad and mad. 

And I've wanted to take my wounded pride and run away.

As fast and as far as I could.

The good news is that, day by day, I'm tenderizing

and that pride is turning toward grace. And gratitude.

I'm thankful for a new opportunity, for sure and

I'm ever so grateful to readers, family and friends

who've checked in on me and normalized my feelings.

Just yesterday, Sue (whom I look forward to meeting in real life one day) sent an email to make sure I was okay.

She validated the notion that counselors need a job that fits. 

And she said she was crying with me. 

There's that glorious virtue of empathy. 

I value that in a friend.

And it helped me move toward the how.

So tomorrow when I wake up, I'll be a year older.

And a lot of tears wiser.

It'll be a new month and another chance

to grieve the goodbye with grace.

And to move forward.

I'm lucky and abundantly blessed to have worked since dial-up in a school, 

where I've felt rooted while rooting for kids, 

where I've felt joy basking in the climate of caring, 

where I've always felt at home. 

We're starting the mural on the wall in my Counseling Cove in the morning, a nice first step into my new story.

Good grief; is that a twinge of excitement I'm feeling?

Grace ... it's a beautiful thing.

3

With Grace

Happy St. Patrick's Day to all of my Irish friends.

Today would have been my Grandma Natzke's 105th birthday, 

and memories of her have me thinking about grace.

Grace.

Love. 

Mercy.

Kindness. 

Clemency.

Compassion. 

Unearned favor.

Undeserved merit.

Is there anything you'd rather be saturated in right now? 

Like kindness, grace tends to have that boomerang effect.

The more we receive grace, the more we want to give grace.

To experience it with our whole heart.

Grace. 

Harmony for the soul.

Harmony. 

My one little word for 2015.

Little yet big.

Having enough. 

Being at peace.

Together.

Experiencing mercy.

And grace. 

In good times.

And in bad.

Grace for that child who loses his wallet.

Grace for that friend who just won't listen to you.

Grace for that sibling who drinks too much..

Grace for that adult who keeps letting you down.

Grace for that colleague who is always short with you.

Grace for that parent who hurt you.

Grace ... for yourself.

Undeserved.

Unmerited.

Unconditional.

On purpose.

Can you feel the harmony?

Is it well with your soul?

And if not, how can you increase the dose?

Grace. More than just a prayer you say before meals ...  

it's simply a beautiful way of life.

Circa 1990 with Aunt Norma, Grandpa and Grandma Natzke

So today, I'm grateful to a grandmother who showered us

with grace. And I'm smiling.

2

A Cushion Of Calm

Words aren't flowing as freely as I'd like them to as I attempt to recap the renewal and restoration I experienced at last weekend's retreat, so I'm borrowing the phrase ~ a cushion of calm ~  from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young to describe what has enveloped me.

The invitation came last July as I was sitting in the airport awaiting my flight to Santa Barbara for a kindness training: Would you be willing to be the featured speaker at our annual Women's Retreat? And my answer, without giving it any thought at all, was yes! The theme would be Real Grace and I'd have three one-hour sessions throughout the weekend to share relevant reflections that would help the women renew and restore. For nine months, seeds of grace germinated in my heart and mind. I prayed and prepared and prayed some more. I hand-picked some inspirational verses and made this interactive vision board.

Thanks to social media, my cousin Amy, whom I'd not seen or interacted with in 25 years, found out about and was able to register for the retreat. I'm still in awe of how similar she and I are in personality despite the distance of years and miles between us. Our reunion instantly felt like we'd known each other forever! 

 A teacher from our school family, Ann, also came along. A relaxed Friday night, with ice breakers and a touching candle-light devotion prior to an early tuck-in time, started the retreat off on an incredibly high note. Of course, Amy and I had a lot of catching up to do, so it was just way past midnight when we finally fell asleep. We woke up to this beautiful canvas just outside our window.

It set the scene for an equally-gorgeous day filled with food, fun, festivities and faith. My interactive sessions {Grace & Gifts, Grace & Gratitude} went really well, the weather cooperated for the nature hike and the scavenger hunt, and the songs of praise and worship throughout the day tugged at our heartstrings and left not a dry eye in the group of women, two-dozen strong, as we connected with our innermost being and with the gift of one another.

I made it a little farther up the Challenge Tower than this picture shows and feel certain I could have made it to the top, but a victory for me personally was allowing myself to be done before I'd finished. 

Permission. 

To say enough. 

And be okay.

After a Bunco tournament, S'mores by the fire, and a thunderstorm complete with a grand lightning display, we were ready for a good night's sleep. Sunday morning brought us back to the table for biscuits & gravy, then into our last session to talk about Grace & Glory. I shared the story of my great Aunt Norma before turning it over to the ladies for a recap. They found their partners by connecting the pieces of a puzzle that they would find inside an empty plastic heart and tying the verse in to a take-away from the weekend.  

Their heartfelt thoughts were more powerful than anything I could have come up with and they totally put the exclamation point on our time together. We talked about the metaphor of the heart, how there is strength in our brokenness because it's through those cracks that Light can shine. The ballad Tell Your Heart To Beat Again by Phillips, Craig & Dean, followed by an emotional circle-up Benediction, 

launched us into greatness.

Such a blessing, to be saturated in grace 

and enJOY that cushion of calm.

2

Real Grace

Today marks the two-year anniversary of the day that would launch me into a transformational time of experiencing real grace in my life. It's not like I hadn't ever known real grace, it's just that it took a head-on collision to help me slow down and recalculate. It was just what I needed. And that was no accident, because that experience is exactly what I'll be drawing on as I prepare to talk about unmerited favor of the real kind at this women's retreat in March. Check it out; 

we'd love to have you participate with us if at all possible.

Click the graphic for registration information.

Real grace ... and gratitude. Today I'm grateful for the many speaking opportunities that are coming my way, opportunities to plant seeds 

of inspiration and joy. 

Tomorrow I'll be talking with the newest inductees in our local National Honor Society and their teachers and parents. I am delighted about this invitation because Friendswood High School is the first high school where I taught when I moved from WI to TX. I recently found a picture of the day thirty years ago that I started that journey south.

I drove to TX without a job but quickly found a Jr. High where I could teach Spanish as a sixth-grade rotating elective, eighth-grade Spanish I and English as a Second Language. A year later, a Spanish position opened up in Friendswood, but I was having trouble getting the Principal to even call me back for an interview. I'll never forget begging his secretary to please, just let me talk to him for one minute. She acquiesced and put me through to Mr. Wilson, who told me in no uncertain terms that he'd found someone for that job and would be offering it to her that afternoon. Then, in a gutsy move, I said, "I could come by right after lunch." There was an awkward pause, probably because he wasn't exactly sure how to answer that, then he told me to go ahead and make it 1:00. He gave me real grace, and then he gave me a job. I taught Spanish there from 1986 until 1995.

Tomorrow will also be special because our son, Joshua, will be one of the students at the NHS ceremony. What would you say to these amazing young leaders if you were given fifteen minutes with them?

I'm thinking about including this, because with real grace ...

Next Monday, I get to spend two hours with a group of elementary physical education teachers in Clear Creek ISD, then the following Monday I'll be reading from my book at a Family Literacy Night in Alvin ISD. In February, I'll be working with the elementary counselors in Pasadena ISD and later that month, I'll be a luncheon speaker for the Bay Area Alliance.

Real grace and gratitude continue ... 

I can't wait to inspire and challenge my audience 

to unplug and plug in,

to live in the moment,

to find blessings in their burdens,

to apologize and forgive,

to express gratitude in all things,

and to always appreciate the gift of grace.

2